Foreword
Monday, December 31, 2007
Not that everybody thinks of it that way, but generally speaking, so they say, the scene would attribute to a less-than-a-second conjecture that he/she has some loose screws, thereby bringing about nerve impulses, activating one’s sympathetic nervous system to indicate a u-turn (away from being harrassed or whatever) and run.
Run. That's exactly how my getaway plan would be. Forget the surrounding sea of people. Forget the cranky-driven, madly-honking cars in the street. Forget the injury-prone ankles and feet wearing the newly-bought high-heeled shoes. Forget everything. Just run. Away. From the madman.
However, about two years ago, in as short (yet long) as two weeks, I (and some others) have been compelled to submit to the desensitization of that fear: I lived (“exposed” is supposedly the term, yet the former justifies the experience since most of my time had been devoted and spent there) with what we call the lunatics.
Anxiety-rush and the putrid smell of cat litter filled the atmosphere the first time I stepped inside the institution. And though equipped with psychosocial theories and self-awareness lessons (the primary armor for such interactions) taught in class, nothing, indeed nothing, prepared me to what lies ahead.
Left with no choice (running away would mean a failed grade in Psychiatric Nursing), I took a deep breath and began my two-week exodus to the world of the mentally misbegotten.
So there I was, standing near a neat, normal-looking man, who, in a minute or two, stomped his feet, pointed to the sky and shouted “Kuyawa ana uy!” as if he saw some intelligent life form floating above him. I, in turn, gazed up and found nothing but clear, blue sky. Then suddenly, someone tightly held my hand, stared at me with a smile and said “Hi Mam! Morning Mam!” I, though alarmed, smiled back and convinced him to let me hold him, instead of him holding me (now you have an idea how to deal with someone like him). And then there’s this lady who pointed her finger at me, and told the white-uniformed students surrounding her that she speaks only to me because I wore blue.
Blue and slightly ruffled (I have learned how to interact with them without any thoughts of running away). It would have been fit to describe my first few days and I wouldn't deny I almost went gaga with my attempts to rationalize and delve the supposedly mind-boggling psychopathologies. Yet those day-to-day monologues (and if you’re lucky, it would be dialogues) of the misbegottens, whether undeniably inane, scandalous and petrifying, could sometimes impart lucidity to a rather, thought-to-be mentally-hinged individual like me.
"Do not keep emotions entirely to yourself, it's detrimental to your health," said one cracked mind (the monologue's been said exactly the way it is written in this paragraph, they are grammatically correct, mind you). That got me.
So much so, crazy or not, I took the advice and wrote this very first soliloquy.
for Josefa and the monologues she shared
@ 
12 Comments:
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At December 30, 2007 at 4:22 PM,
Miki said...
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hiya kends!
welkam back to da blogging community!
miss ya :)
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At December 30, 2007 at 7:43 PM,
kendi said...
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hehe... blog sa buang ni kuya miks. tenchyu! at least dili naka magyayaw kung dis-a nako napadpad. :)
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At December 30, 2007 at 8:19 PM,
said...
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ang binisaya rajud nga part ato akong nasabtan hahahaha
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At December 31, 2007 at 1:06 AM,
Jan said...
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Cherish the sparks of madness. They keep us alive.
Glad you're back, Kends. =)
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At December 31, 2007 at 8:53 AM,
said...
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i like your new blog, Kends. it's very clean. nurse-like clean. hehe.
hey, nga pla, to be spanishly-grammatically-correct, it's "SANTUARIO."
luv u, kends.
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At January 1, 2008 at 12:35 AM,
said...
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nice foreword cands. =) ayos pud ang template sa blog bah.
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At January 1, 2008 at 7:11 PM,
said...
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ngilngig jud ka gao.
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At January 2, 2008 at 10:38 AM,
said...
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hahaha, sa sotto ni kendz nuh??=) ako patient didto sauna kay si eric,i dunno kung nakaabot pa ka a2 niya, one year ahead rba ko nimo..balhin naman pud unta kog blogspot, pero di pko kalet-go sa ako blogdrive bisan cge lang ug kadown,hehhe..
change nya nko ako links..
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At January 2, 2008 at 11:23 PM,
kendi said...
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@ dan: wahahaha! kuyawa ning manong jud uy! bisaya ra jud? pero if JAVA or Ajax or html, sure ko makasabot ka. see u in cebu... naa koy ube manong... gusto ka ideliver nako sa ayala? hehehe...
@ janica: indeed... they keep me insanely sane. ;p
@ reich: mami, nurse na ba talaga ako? hehe. i like it white kasi makakapagdrawing ako ng kahit ano dito. sowi, will change ur link po. luv u too mami! :)
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At January 2, 2008 at 11:29 PM,
kendi said...
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@ rian: thanx ry... padrawing ka? bayad sa. ;p
@ mamart: ngilngig pud ka gao! di ka moreply ug text. cge ko text nimo unsay cellphone number ni Fafa Marlon, wa jud ka reply. saon nalang. pero nagkita na mi sa ER ganiha buntag. hekhek. charing kau na cya. uber. ;p
@ kai: yeps, sa VSMMC na cya. kaabot pa kong Eric, Marvin, Palang ug uban pa. hehe. lingaaaw kau noh? ilara ko tits! ingon pa ni Marvin. ako kay si Josefa man dear... ang maldita nga bipolar. hehe. lipat ka na dito. :)
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At January 3, 2008 at 12:27 AM,
said...
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i waited.
the 20 shots of liquor was good enough to ease the pain when you said no.
candz, pls?
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At January 4, 2008 at 2:22 PM,
kendi said...
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@ anonymous: errr... was it distilled alcohol? i need some, for benedict's test. ;p
kidding aside, stop it. you're mimicking me.
but i miss you and your antics though. ;p